Cock of the day

People commenting on the Daily Mail website often show that they cannot read anything other than the headline, regardless of how short the article is. Today’s moron is N Cockburn, Falkirk and he is really putting the Cock into Cockburn. The article is a light-hearted, feel-good story about a fisherman that rescued some ducklings: ‘The fisherman’s tale that saw eight lucky ducklings saved from certain death‘. The story is told by the pond-owner who states that:

Mr Pady, of Colyford, said: ‘We had an urgent call from the fisherman to say the ducklings were in trouble.
‘They were caught in a drain which is the pond’s outflow – the mother duck was clearly upset, calling down the pipe.

‘The fisherman could hear them making a noise at the bottom so we lowered a ladle to see if they would get in, but they wouldn’t.

‘We couldn’t think how else to get them out, but the fisherman put a piece of bread on a barb-less hook and lowered it and after a while he caught one of the ducklings.

‘It was all downy fluff, so it didn’t do the duckling any harm – and he was able to reel it up the pipe. Then he carried on for another two and a half hours taking the ducklings out one by one until he’d got all eight.’

‘I said he’d be in line for an RSPB award for rescuing the birds but I don’t know his name and he has yet to come back.’

As for the offending pipe: ‘We’ve put a grill shelf from a fridge over it now – the old one had disintegrated,’ said Mr Pady. ‘It was one of those jobs you keep meaning to get around to, but don’t.’

So, the person being interviewed is quite clearly – as stated at the very start of the article – Mr Pady. The fisherman was clearly a second person who did not give his name to Mr Pady. All seems pretty clear to anyone who could get through the first couple of paragraphs, but not N Cockburn:

He seems to have read the whole article because he refers to the confession from the pond owner in the last line, but he has managed to have a nice little rant with SHOUTING whilst being entirely wrong in every way. Congratulations N Cockburn: you are Cock of the Day.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *